The Hurricane by Colin Creative Music

Microscopic Synopsis : Sarah, the Princess of Athenia, introduces her

rockstar fiance Dave, a dreadlocked caucasian whose stage name is Penistasia - to Psychic Dahlia from Nicaragua, with the hope that Dave would become one of her Psychic clients. But Dahlia instead

falls in love with the rock star and steals him from the the Princess. However,

Dave`s constant burst of jealous rage over Dahlia would eventually drive a

wedge into their relationship.Opening scenes: Dave and Dahlia privately ballroom-dancing her lovesong parody classical piece :Dahlia: "You don`t know where/I`m go-o-ing toDave (smiling): "Yes, I do!-) Dahlia: How could you tell where I`m go-o-ing to!?Dave: "Cuz I`M COMING TOO!!:)) Dahlia: (faking a frown)"Oh no! Now GO...cuz I tell thee so!For I`m not thy wife / never in your lifeThen Dave/ got pissed/ and said "F - 2 - U/ She said "F - U- 2!!!:))))

Chapter 1 - Narrator: (a)

Colin`s Letter To The Romans - regarding his trip to Oregonia - capital of Athenia, home to Dave and Dahlia - addressed to Emperor Mellenezad, ruler of the ancient roman empire

The moon was arisingin the horizonremindful of the daysof MesopotamiaSome called them dummiesothers called them zombies all of which was basedon gross misconceptions`Cause one was a geniusaddicted to Calculusone claimed amnesiaone claimed insomniaone named Aphrodisiacreverent to ZodiacBut one strange thing I noticedThey all were singingjuicy songs of loveThey said: Padda-piddypiddy-lay piddy-laypadda-piddy piddy-lay Scribingly yours, Colin Peter 1679 A.D. He was cautious - however - to omit another song that followed. They (aliens) harbored the belief that all men and women must be proud of (and not ashamed of) whatever god created on and in them. And in the intrinsic value of his command that, "In ALL that you do, ACKNOWLEDGE my name!! ALL meaning, 100%. As such, worthy of praise and thanksgiving, hence their contagious rock 'n' roll song: "This dick that I have / the world didn`t give it to methis dick that i have / the world didn`t give it to meThis dick that I have / the world didn`t give it to meThe world didn`t give itand the world can`t take it away!(I said) This dick (clap! clap!)This dick!(clap! clap!)the world didn`t give it to meI said this dick (pause pause)this dick! (pause pause)the world didn`t give it to meAnd the world can`t take it awayThen the women sang : this pussy that I have...Then: These titties that I have...etc etc until all words of body parts (that "rhymed") were added: (Then came a military-sounding voice):"Ask the folks in Hollywood! (united voices sang: "The world didn`t give it to me!") Ask the folks in Inglewood(The world didn`t...)Ask the folks even up in Beverlywood..they`ll say the world didn`t give so the world can`t take it away!You can tug on it all you want(Hooga-chaka hooga-chaka hoo hoo hooga-chaka!)Bug me about it all you want(Hooga-chaka hooga-chaka hoo hoo hoo!)But the world didn`t give it / so the world can`t take it awayOne..two.. three!Oo oo whee!they can`t take it from me - e - e (oh no)God gave it to me for free (yea yea)As the world didn`t give itso the world can`t take it away!The serious expressions on their faces as they sang and danced joyfully, has never escaped my thoughts.

Chapter 1(b) - Place: Athenia - Date: December 11th, 1999 - THE FIRST

SEDUCTION - Dave and Dahlia alone in Psychic room

And it came to pass that on this day, Dahlia the Psychic relates to Dave about a dream she had recently, in which the two of

them had intercourse together. She then skillfully uses that story to seduce

him. Dave grants her wishes, by mounting himself on Dahlia’s nakedness,

and proceeds to "service" her, in perfect synchronization to the

rhythm of a love song, by romantically plumbing the depths of her lower

orifice, much to her satisfaction:

Dahlia : "Rock thou my world, O crazy

cockmonster! Knowest not thou that my soul craveth

for thee? Release thou thy inhibitions, and let the innermost walls of my

clitorical attributes encapsulate the thrrust of thy hardened manliness, O

gorgeous cockasoid!" She says, sounding more british than ever( definition of Cockasoid: a sexually-charged male - Colin`s Cyber Dictionary ). "Fill thou

my female vessel with the sweetness of thy love portion. Fill it - till I

crave no more!"

 

She begins her story:

 

The morning came too soon

Before the fading of the moon

Lost in love / a way of love

With pillows on the sunlit floor

No denying / no regrets

I felt love right from the start

And you know love can please a craving heart

So love / steal my heart body and soul

In A Million Ways

'Cause making love is part of being in love

It takes a union of two people

And A Million Ways To Love

I wasn't searching when I met you

Heaven knows this much is true

Your tender touch / your sweet words

Oh, the joy they bring

Will you love me

I mean really really love me

Forever love me in A Million Ways

Dave complies with Dahlia´s sexual request; even in his semi-hypnotic state

of mind. As I listened in (eavesdrop), I could hear Dahlia almost ordering that Dave optimizes his sexual performance: 

"Why screwest thou me as though thou hast no life in thee?" She

asks, angrily. "Know ye not how to please a sex-craving vixen?? Behold, I

am Dahlia - proclaimed Mistress of the Dark and of the Light. So, pound it! I

demand of thee." (Propping herself up with her elbows, for better

elevation and support). "No pongo en mi culo..okay (whispers Dahlia)? Porkeh tu es mucho grande!(giggles). Only pongo in me banotcha okay? No en me nalga - okay? Just my choocha. Dave: Okay (he answers, in a deep but quiet tone of voice). No en me nalga..okay?Dave: Okay (again, in the same deep but quiet baritone voice) Dahlia: Pound it to a pulp!.... And spare not my flesh, I

command thee!" (she screams).

As I zoomed in the lenses of my spy camera, I could see Dave trying arduously to deliver, with the extra physical support from

Dahlia.Pound it to a pulp!.... And spare not my flesh, I

command thee!" (she screams).

As I zoomed in the lenses of my spy camera, I could see Dave trying arduously to deliver, with the extra physical support from

Dahlia. The screwmentation goes on, non-stop, for almost three-quarters

of an hour. "Ow!! WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU?!! DIDN`T I TELL YOU NOT TO PUT IT IN THERE??Dave: Oops!! Pardon me..it just slipped by accidentDahlia: Well put it where I told you!Dave complies. Dahlia: Ooh-ooh! ayah yai!!..Ooh ooh... aya yai!! Mamma-miya! Pepper

mucho!!Give it to me..Yes Sir!! Ooh-ooh...aya yai.....!

screams Dahlia over and over again in perfect

Spanglish and, in perfect rythmic sync (4/4 timing..to the max:)))!!) to the

forculational act going on. She writhes - she flinches - she screams,

"Yes! Oh, yes!!! - as the nectar from her juicy nectarine, gently drips

onto the light-blue satin sheets. "Ishakalaka shikalaka!" she screams (first woman to ever speak in tongues at the peak of orgasm. Almost scares the living daylights out of Dave:) )Once the two of them have done their best,

they lay down - ass to ass - and take their rest.

 

Chapter 2 - IN THE CASTLE OF THE PRINCESS

PLACE: London, England, August 17th in the year 2000

A female pianist accompanies the Princess, as she tells of her strained

relationship with Dave, totally oblivious of the fact that Dahlia is solely

responsible for driving a wedge into her relationship with Dave:

 

We've been together for quite a while

Destiny has brought us yet another mile

How much longer till our restless hearts unite

Filled with sincerity / secured by nature's might

Suspicions of being unfaithful (has) never been proven

Still we're drifting apart /from a love once great at the start

Time Will Tell / Time Will Tell

Could a match made in Heaven be made again

Time Will Tell

Love was the reason we found ourselves entwined

Captured by a spell which now has made us blind

 

Whatever the cost to make love fair

I'd be glad to pay my share

Straight from the heart you know I would

 

 

  

 

 

Chapter 3 Dahlia alone with Dave on a Romanesque sofa in the psychic lounge

For the second time, Dahlia uses hypnosis to successfully seduce Dave, by

creating images in his mind. Dave comes home one evening from band rehearsals,

as he was about to embark on a worldwide tour with his rock group. Feeling

tired and beastly hungry, he asks Dahlia what`s for dinner. Dahlia then climbs

unto the bare dining table, spreads her legs apart and teasingly replies,

"fresh juicy lettuce and a giant succulent beansprout, just for you!! Bon

appetite!!" she says with a loud giggle (as in, "eat this!")

:))))) Dave is far from amused. He storms into the kitchen, grabs a bag of

stale french fries and gobbles it all up in a matter of minutes.

Dahlia then attempts to hypnotize Dave in order to sexually seduce him. She

will not take "no" for an answer.

Note : In this event, two images are created in Dave's mind:

1. She then continues to put Dave under sexually-controlled hypnotic spell

by painting images of Dave and herself flying on a giant, red heart

-shaped object (with subtle anatomical undertone) - the hypnotic image.

2. The actual sexual act occurring between the two of them.

Only this time, Dahlia gets more experimental : As

Dave lays on the couch in a hypnotic state, Dahlia unzips his pants, and slowly

unleashes his sexual "weaponry" - his "cannon",

as well as his "cannon balls". She then proceeds to "oralize"

his "hardware" in a frenzy, by blowing his "pipe",

while simultaneously squeezing his "bolus humongous" (twin

airbags / testicles / balls), with the dexterity of a Scottish Bag-Piper, and with the

resulting melody of sexual pleasure emanating from Dave`s mouth, as she

"plays" on. Ferociously sorculating the fuselage of Dave`s

jumbo jet, with reckless abandon.

Just then, there is a knock on the door, much to Dave`s displeasure. As far

as he is concerned, there could never be a more inopportuned time. Not when he

is having the moment of his life with the woman he fondly refers to as

"Freaky Miss Daisy...instead of Dahlia, her real name:

Rat-a-tat-tat

Who is that

You can stay out there

for all I care

I`m in a session with my lady

freaky Miss Daisy

I can`t open up the door for you

I`ve got Glossy Fingers

Oh yeah yeah

I`ve got Glossy Fingers

I don`t wish to be disturbed this time of day

I won`t tell you what she asked me to do

`Cause it`s not between me and you

It`s a private affair

One I don`t wanna share

`cause it was only meant for me

I`ve got Glossy Fingers

Disregarding the disturbance, the love making continues. Dahlia then goes down on her knees and performs the lewinsky (dicksuckation)- for the second time - on the rock star:"I

sucketh not thy penile protrusion out of just love, or lust. Oh, no! But out of

a combination there-of, lest these gorgeous lips of mine be looked upon as

lifeless pieces of meat. For indeed I believe that love and lust goeth together

like horse and carriage. Alas, my poor stallion, prepare thyself; for I shall

now ride thee straight into the sunset of passion! To screw, or not to screw -

that is the freaking question. And I, Dahlia, shall be damned if I choose not

the former!" Dave (eyes closed and smiling with cyber-romantic acquiescence): - "Well ride Sally ride!!:)"

At which point, she sits her bare self on Dave's "penile hardware", and

proceeds to ride on it savagely, like a wild rodeo. Literally giddyupping

on it like there was no tomorrow. Heee-haaaa!! she screams, as she

rides on it joyfully, all the way to never-never land.

DAHLIA :

Here we are again in perfect harmony

in a kingdom built on love / just us two

When the wild wind blows

we can never lose our dreams

When the wild wind blows

we can fly on precious wings

FLYING!! in the sky on precious wings of love

FLYING!! to a world where lovers live their golden dreams

FLYING ON PRECIOUS WINGS of love

We're going to a place we've never been before

And way below the sky the morning birds are singing

 

  

 

 Chapter 3 b Dave treats Dahlia to a theatrically amusing love poem he entitles, The Female Stranger:

I saw her from across the street

I felt her from across the street

I smelt her as she passed me by on the crosswalk

once the light turned green

Her petite brown-chocolate body

well-fragranced

as a rose in the crack of a cold and misty morn

Petite, yet so well-proportioned

The helm of her skimpy miniskirt

could have been no more than an inch or two

away from the tips of her young vaginal lips

If she had as little as bent over

to touch her knee with her pointer finger

all her most private areas

would have in effect lost their privacy

so to speak

My mouth watered

as I entertained wild thoughts

of mutual sexual engagement

between this lady and I

How old could she be

18 at least - I hope

God, how I hope she is 18!

Interestingly enough, that young mini-skirted girl Dave saw in his dream, was the same person, now fully matured and introduced to Dave by Princess Sarah. That girl was in fact Dahlia

Chapter 4 Dave And Dahlia In A Botanical Garden in the Outskirts of

Monaco

- Squabble Ensues Over Dahlia`s alleged Dalliances

Dahlia raises serious concerns over a recent burst of jealous rage by Dave,

and hints that this behavior was likely to cause a problem in their

relationship. She points out a most recent incident in which Dave tried to pick

a fight with one of her male clients, whom he accused of accepting

"complimentary sexual acts" from Dahlia, an argument that Dave

himself had initiated, by making all kinds of forculatory gestures at

the client.

On that occasion, Dave had stormed into Dahlia`s Psychic room, suspicious of

something of a sexual nature going on between Dahlia and a male client. He

noticed that Dahlia and the client were completely shocked to see Dave home so

early. They were both perspiring and out of breath and both were smoking a

cigarette - something which Dahlia would usually only do after engaging in a

sexual act. He also noticed the client`s jacket was crumpled and misbuttoned,

causing the right side of the jacket to be longer than the other. He

immediately accused her of putting her "vital substance on the Open

Market". The male client, a dimunitive Middle-Eastern fellow who spoke with a strong foreign

accent, tried to explain to Dave that he was only there to have his future told

: "Please Sir, I not here to fuckee wiss za lady, Sir....no, Sir! Me, I

only here to askee za lady to tellee forr me za future, Sir...", the poor

guy struggled to explain, in his broken English. But Dave angrily replied:

" I would give not a rat`s ass, nor a donkey`s balls, what be

the purpose of thy visitation. As long as thou seatest in the presence of my

fair lady - within the confines of closed doors - while the elements between

her legs are in plain view - that, alone, beareth justification for some

serious ass-kicking which shall transpire, should thou choose

not to remove thyself from our premises immediately!! Thou art barking up the wrong tree, I can assure thee. And each time thou sayest Woof Woof, thou shall get a Boof Boof central to thy face. And when thou wakest up in the morning, thou shall slowly run thy fingers through my knuckle indentations on thy face and ask of thyself: "Self, what art thou? (in a manner remindful of the grimaces of George The Animal Steel:) Of what species have I become??!"

The client still remained defensive of himself and Dahlia. But, by this

time, Dave`s level of tolerance had reached an all time low:

"Screw thee,Thou termite! Thou bloody nitwit! Thou piece of malformed

fungus erroneously characterized as human!! (said Dave loudly.)

Yessirrr...fungus Sir!!! concurred the client.

Hush! Dave barked: I am not done yet!!

Yessirr! The client responded.

Dave continues:Thou pinhead! Thou dickless Cockerspaniel! Thou worse than

roasted chitlings! Thou shameless pee-on! Thou piece of flushable

unmentionable! Thou stinking elephant`s butt. Thou rotten egg-induced fart!

Thou miserable son of a female german shepherd!! Thou pathetic remnant

of an experimental mishap!! Thou half-cooked turkey on a Thanksgiving table!

Thou pitiful bolsless monkey!! Dave remorsefully recalls screaming at the

client. "Why goeth not thou into the streets and find thyself some female freakasoidal

sex-peddler to screw around with? Thou effing S.O.B.!! Screw thee...screw

thee...screw thee!!!" (using his middle finger, fist, and thrusting

pelvis, to emphasize the point). His every sentence/phrase/insult requiring a

different kind of posture by Dave, as though examining the client from a

critic`s point of view. Walking around him at times...sometimes, with both

closed fists on his hips...with the pomposity of a King....stopping suddenly to

examine the client`s face pretty closely....zooming in on his face...so to

speak.

Dave: I shall now take a circumspective view of your ugly face, he advises

the client, as he proceeds to "examine" him from various angles.

Yessirr...yessirr... was his usual response. "ugly face sirr!

Dave: "And the key of "F" major to you too!!" But the

client just won`t stop arguing with Dave.

Dave: (Really losing his cool) What part of "fuck you" does thou

not understand?" (He asked degradingly of the poor

fellah......"...the f-u-c-k or, the y-o-u?" Client: (Totally out of

whack by this time)"Za..za... f-u-c-k Sir. Za f-u-c-k ...or...or...OR..za

vy-o-u sir....i not underrrstand anysing sir!!!!!(the poor guy stutters). Dave:

Oh shut thy ugly mouth...thou cross-eyed mongoose!!! Thou art so lost...so

disillusioned..so far off base..so pitifully malcentered (cyber dictionary link

to definition)- it appears as if thy medulla oblongata could not be any farther

away from thy brain....thou non-operative..beyond spiritually salvageable

thetan (as opposed to an Operable Thetan..see cyb dict for definition)

"Take this - "bshshshsh! !!!(Dave lands an uppercut left jab to the

client`s right cheek, spinning him approximately 180 degrees from his original

standing position. "Now, how about that for a physical interpretation?

(Dave asks the client, sarcastically. Client: Yessirr!

The client has now suffered an hourlong of interrugation from Dave, and

reached out to take a sip of the drink Dahlia had poured him before the start

of their Psychic session. But Dave quickly steps his foot on the client`s hand,

causing the drink to spill on the floor. The client, unable to sustain his

thirst anymore,says to Dave, "Please sirr, can I have somessing to drink?

I am verry verry thirrsty sirr." DAVE: I shall not give thee JACK!...SHIT THAT IS!! Diddly squat! Says Dave in a soft but still forceful tonality.

"Not even the sweat off my balls!!!" (Dave`s voice sounding guttural and laced with

anger). Client: "Yessirrr..okay sirr...yessirr...no prrroblem sirr!"

Dave: Now, I shall ask you this: Did Dahlia give you any sexual instructions..like

touching any part of her body?" "No sir..no sir" replied the

client, complying with Dahlia`s secret gestures urging him to deny it. Dave:

"If thou lieth to me, I shall smash thy face beyond recognition.

Understood?" CLIENT: "Yessir..yessirr.. okay sir - I tellee for you

za troot sir....za whole troot...nossing buttee za troot sirr!: She tellee to

me, "touchee my titty...touchee my peepee...touchee my whooshy-whooshy...!

(stuttering)An` zen..an` zen she say, you licky forr me, I sucky forr

you". Dave: I`ll be darned! Clitlickation and dicksuckation,

huh?!"(his anger mixing with ridicule).

DAHLIA: (covering her mouth and screaming out loud) Puta madre! La grande puta!!(she curses)

I said no such thing!!..that`s a freakin` lie...you bastard!!" DAVE (to

Dahlia): " Oh please...spare me the deception! I am all too familiar with

thy vocabulary.. It sounds plausible enough. I believe him. Client: (rubbing

it in to save his skin) Yessirrr..it iz za troot sir! "Cerrar la boca

cabron! Ponga la boca en su culo! Pinche perro!!(bellowed Dahlia, in her broken Spanish). But the poor guy could not

comprehend a single word of Spanish while sober - much less in his now inebriated state. He kept on talking. Running his "boca" so to speak. Dahlia: "Shut your mouth, pedarast!!"

Client: (shaking his head and waving his pointer finger rapidly) "No..Me

no pedarast..your daddy pedarast!..your daddy passionehwhee!!" replied the

client, surprisingly. "Your mazzar AND your fazzarr......"

"Quiet!!" Dave yelled, before the client would finish his statement.

"I will not have you talk to my fair Lady in such a manner!!" Client:

(going back to the accusation) "Zat iz exacky-teely (exactly) vot she

tellee to me sirr!" DAVE (to client) "Granted...but did you follow

her instructions? Did you touch her? " CLIENT: (eyes darting back and

forth from Dave to Dahlia) "No sir..I not touchie anyssing sir. I not

touchie za bitch sirr!" Dave: (poising to demolish the client`s face for

using the proverbial "B" word) "What?? Did thou just call my lady the capital "B" word??

" Oh no sirr!! Sorry sirr!" Dave: (guardedly relieved that

it was probably just a slip of tongue) "I thought..!! As if to say, "you

wouldn`t dare!" Client:" I..I..tellee to za lady, I am afraid

boyfriend will gettee angry wiss me sir." "Fiance!" snapped Dave

in correction. "Yessirrr..yessir" responded the client as he

protected his face, thinking Dave was about to deliver another Tyson Special to

his face. But Dave was merely gesturing with his hands while speaking, as

usual. DAVE: I shall ask you one last time: Did you touch any part of her like

she requested? Dahlia secretly gestured to the client to say no. "No sir!

Abbee-so-lu-teelee no sir!" Dave: Wow! Thou speaketh now in collegiate

language! Impressive! Absolutely huh? CLIENT: Yessir..abbee-so-lu-teely no

sir..I not touchee nossing sir (he said confidently). Dave: Very well. I shall

examine thy hand. He siezed the clients hand and examined it. And realized the

client`s fingertips were all "nice and glossy" ! Anger visibly

swelled in Dave. "Why you dirty twisted doubletongued primate!! How dare

you lie to me? Take this..hiyyyaaaaahhhh!!!!: Dave expertly delivered a kung-fu

sidekick to the clients groin area, causing him to bend over and moan in pain.

"Ouchee..ouchee..ooh..ooh..ouchee..ouchee ooh..ooh!! Yessir yessir! No

morr sirr..pleezee no morr sirr! cried the client, as he cupped his balls with

both hands to protect them from further assault. Dave: That should teach you a

valuable lesson thou ugly monkey!!" Client: Yessirr..yessirr!

NOTE: Since this story is designed to promote family values, the actual raw

language MUST be avoided as much as possible!!:

CLIENT: (trying desperately to argue with Dave): "Please

sirr...you not underrrrstand...I esplain forrr you...Me,..(Dave angrily

interrupts him)"Pardon me.." says Dave, somewhat sarcastically - ...

since when did an imbecile earn the right to even talk back to an intellectual

such as I ??!!" The poor client was too dumbfounded to even figure out how

to respond. Note: The test of the client`s self esteem has begun.

"Pardon also (Dave continues), my candid observation that the degree of

thy intellect is so low - so lilliputian - so minuscule - it would require the

help of a microscope to discern it !!! Taking it closer, thou art so

ugly-looking even a baboon will take offense at the mere mention of your name

in tandem with his!! Dave then brought his nose a little closer to the client.

: I shall now take a whiff of thee, he said. (he sniffs out the client a couple

of times. "Thou stinketh!! He remarks. "Yessirr...stinky stinky

sirr!! Responded the client (sniffing his own armpits). "Stinky stinky

indeed", Dave agreed. Let me take a look at thy attire. Yessirr! the

client responds. Dave looks up and down at the client`s crumpled and unmatched

suit. "Thy jacket seems as though it was handed over to you in a

hurry", said Dave observedly. "Yessirr...yessirr..." agrees the

client. "I tellee forr you vhot happen: I has anozzer jacket - a betterr

von", explains the client. "But my barrrazzar - za _ mazzar fackar -

he takeee my jacket - he sell it to buy kirrack sirr. "Your what...? your

barrazzar? Poopology! Pure poopology!!(Dave exclaims). "What meanest thou

by the word "barrazzar? No such word in the English lexicon!!. "

Dahlia: "He means his "brother!!". "Shhhhhh...i SPEAKETH

NOT TO THEE!", replied Dave to Dahlia strongly. "Why deridest thou my

client...how dare thee!!!????(screams Dahlia defensively). "A fool he is

and I shall minimize him to nothingness!(replies Dave, determinedly).

"Continue!" he said to the client. "Yessirr!! the timid fellow

replied. So, I askee to my barrazar - I say - "barrazar, pleezee, tellee

forr me zis: Vhy you selleee my lezzar jacket to kirrack-house and vhy you

takee za money - twenty dallar - to buy kirrack to seemoke..I say pleezee

tellee to me vhy you makee za tirrouble forr me like zis, brazzar?...I vont to

know. But my barrazar - he not say nossing. I askee to him again, barrazar, vhy

you not answer forr my question? My brrazzar he say...."

"Oh, be quiet (Dave interrupted). "I shall hear no more about that

crackhead brother of yours!!" Dave barked. "Yessirr--yessirr -

replied the client hurriedly. ..."And kiss my big brown eyes, for crying

out loud!!!" Dave added. The client misunderstood Dave - he puckered up

and attempted to kiss Dave`s left eye. Dave threw a left jab unto the client`s

face. "Figurative expression, thou fool! Dave shouted with the pomp of a

King. "Yessirr yessirr" the guy says, nervously rubbing the area of

his face where Dave`s punch had landed.

Dave: Come hither! (he commanded the fellow). Bring thy face a little

closer! (the client shockingly complies in his already-destroyed self esteem).

Dave then thrust his big right fist into the client`s face, sending him

straight across the room. The angry-tyson punch was so severe, it measured 9.5

on the "facial impact scale" (if there`s ever such a thing:))). 10.0

of course, being the strongest! You say "Poof be gone", I say it was

more like Booffff be gone....because Booffffffff!!!!! was the

sound that emanated as Dave`s bare knuckles "collided" with the

client`s face! "Get off thy butt and come hither again!" Dave barks.

The client, dazed as ever does exactly that. To say that he "walked back

towards Dave" will be an outright exaggeration. He STAGGERED his way back

to Dave, his ego already totally pulverized by Dave`s wave of insults. He (the

client) was so confused, he could not tell his left from his right; his ass

from his elbow. Standing in front of Dave again, he receives further command:

Dave: "Stand here, donkey!!"

Client: (apparently totally lost in time and space) "Yesssirr...donkey

sirr....hee-haw...haw-hee haw-hee...hee-haw (client acting exactly like a

donkey on his knees)!!!!" Dave`s eyes clearly reveals his state of shock.

Someone please dart this miserable creature with a tranquilizer for goodness

sake!! Exclaimed Dave. "Yessirrr!...goo...goo...goooonessee saykee sirr!!

sake sirr!

"Silence!!" Dave commanded loudly. His patience wearing thin.

"Yessirrr!" was the client`s reply.

Dave : (rather observedly - ) "Thy mother and thy father must have

begotten you during a moment of public frivolity - rather than a private

attempt to procreate!

Client: Yessirr...prro...pro..prrocrreatee...(the poor guy stutters in an

effort to pronounce the word)!!

Dave: Oh hush thy mouth - for thou speaketh slush (Dave barked)".

"Yes Sirrr...slusheeee sirr! concurred the "imbecile".

Dave: No. Not slushee! That`s SLUSH...as in two stages below gibberish!!

Now, take thy middle finger and stick it up your nose!!

Client: "Yesssirrr ....yessirr!! My middell fingerrrr sirrr!!" He

then shockingly takes his middle finger and sticks it up his own nostril - but

not before he had guessed without success for over a dozen times which one was

in fact, his middle finger....his first guess was his pinkie...then he showed

dave his thumb...back to his pinkie...then the pointer..etc...etc....much to

Dave`s dismay.

Dave: I`ll be darned!!!...just like I thought! (He

exclaimed)...a Neanderthal in our midst!! He says of the client. After the

humiliation, he then grabbed the client by the back of his neck, and literally

kicked him out the door - one big left foot, right where the sun shineth not -

much to Dahlia`s chagrin - And, with the words: "I can now see why even

thy own family members would have nothing to do with thee!!Let it be known from

here-on and henceforth, that thou art nothing but a pooh-pooh with a capital

P!! Understood??" "Yes sir! yessirr!!!..." agreed the client.

"..Poo poo sir. Poo poo wiss..wiss.. err....poo poo wit err..capital vhot

sirr? Sorry sir... I not rememberr za EXACT letterrr sirrr."!! The

Client`s facial expression was, as always, a pitiful combination of fear and

stupidity. Ali was also cautious enough to conceal the fact that Dahlia had in fact lap-danced on him singing an Indian song she jokingly made up herself using only Indian-sounding made-up words, since she could not speak the language: "Buchini yea buchini (Ali responds: Hiley hiley hay!!) Macadu yea macadu (Ali: Hiley hiley hay!:)Buchini and Dickaroo (Hiley hiley hay) simply just want to kissaroo (hiley hiley hay) / But not so with Booty-Lou (hiley hiley hay)/ she just wants to fuckaroo (hiley hiley hay) / After she gets fuck`daroo (hiley hiley hay) she then goes on to wiperoo (hiley hiley hay) But not so with Buchini / (hiley hiley hay) / she goes on to walkaroo (hiley hiley hay) Then she will start to hopperoo (hiley hiley hay) / pretty much like a kangaroo:) (hiley hiley hay:)The phrase "macadu yea macadu" turns out to be of ancient Hindu origin, meaning, "You go girl!!:)The two would then repeat the sweet melody by imitating the flute of a snake charmer. They would then dance around the psychic room as Ali follows closely behind Dahlia, alternating one palm of his hand to the back of his head and the back of the other just above his waist in perfect timing . "Ancient Indian dancing!" he mused.

Dahlia scolded Dave for "assticulating" himself out of nothing at

all. (Definition of "assticulating" - making a fool or an ass of

one`s self - Cyber Dictionary. Note: You must emphasize on the "ass-"

in order for the word to sound more effective. Let the sibilance drag on a

little bit longer, to drive home the point).

Dave, however, tried to justify his behavior to Dahlia, by blaming it all on

the "uncontrollable love" he harbors for her:

We’ve been together a while

and we’ve come another mile

you 'n' me baby

I wonder how much longer

till you love me stronger (oh girl)

Should you ever put my love on trial

I bet there’ll be no cause for denial

I’ll be GUILTY of loving too much

GUILTY of loving too much

I’m addicted to your touch

I’ll be GUILTY of loving too much

I wish there’ll come a time

when we’ll walk down the aisle

You 'n' me baby

We’ll do it all with pride

with dignity and style (oh girl)

Should you ever put my love on trial

I bet there’ll be no cause for denial

I’ll be GUILTY of loving too much

GUILTY of loving too much

I’m addicted to your touch

I’ll be GUILTY of loving too much

` Promise I’m never gonna leave you

or even try to deceive you

Let’s stay together forever

Baby till the end of time

 

Chapter 5 Attempts To Spoil Wedding Plans

Dahlia proposes to Dave, instead of the other way around. And Dave willingly

accepts.

But on the day before their wedding, Dave receives a phone-call from a man

named Jeff, who identifies himself as a former client, and love interest, of

Dahlia.

He claims that Dahlia had a sordid past - a history of bizarre behavioral

tendencies.

According to Jeff, Dahlia used to start her day with a freaky, early morning

ritual. Jeff claims that after taking her shower, Dahlia would bend

over, butt-naked in front of a full-sized mirror, to rub olive oil on her butt,

while singing :

"Shine / Shine / Shine / I’m Gonna Let My Little Ass Shine

Shine it in the morning/ Shine it in the evening/ Shine it in the noon-time

too".

And, that her voice would get louder and louder, as the

"ass-rubbing" assumed more frenzied proportions. The louder she sang,

the faster, and more feverishly, she would rub (says Jeff). And, for a grande

finale, Dahlia would slowly walk around a burning scented candle, while

carefully balancing a rose petal in the crack of her butt, as a good-luck

charm, that she believed would guarantee her any man she desired.

As if that was not shocking enough , Jeff goes as far as saying that

Dahlia’s "full service" psychic package offered to her male clients,

also included "high-gloss facial squats" with clit-syrup hot wax, by

hovering herself above the client’s face, like in a drive-thru car wash, which

she guaranteed would leave her male client’s face all "nice and

shiny". It sounds like Jeff is really speaking from past personal experience.

But by this time, Dave had really had enough, and was about to hit the roof.

Dave would not have anyone disrespect the love of his life, in any manner,

no matter what. Besides, he even suspects that Jeff (who is as drunk as a skunk

when he makes this phone call), is nothing but an opportunistic alcoholic, and

is making up this ridiculous story in order to either destroy his relationship

with Dahlia , or, simply to ride on Dave’s own celebrity status, by selling

this juicy story to the tabloids. After all, who, in the world would not like

to know about a famous rock star, whose psychic girlfriend was screwing her

male clients.

Dave : "Heed my warning!!! If thou leaketh even as little as a single

word about this bloody nonsense to the tabloids, I swear I shall sue the pants

off thy butt! And, for a pretty penny!!"

Jeff (defiantly and with sarcasm): "Well, a pretty penny is all you

shall get. For I shall file for Dicklomatic Immunity (legal protection against

financial screwmentation - Cyber Dictionary. Syn. bankruptcy)"

Dave : "Very well then - mark my word - thou idiot of an earthling: You

shall be sitting on a hot wet towel by the time my Lawyers get through with thy

ass, or my name is not Dave Mountbatten....thou sorry-ass emblem of human

calamity!!!"  

Dave is so furious with Jeff, that he calls him three derogatory

nomenclatures, all in a single sentence: A "deranged degenerate",

an "effing dickrovite" (which is Cyberlinguistics for a

son-of-a-b***ch) and, worst of all, he calls Jeff a "third generation

baboon". Interestingly enough, Jeff does not seem to mind being called

any of these things. Perhaps he is too drunk to get emotional, or, to even feel

offended. As a matter of fact, the more Dave cursed at him, the more dirty

details Jeff would reveal about Dahlia's so-called 'History', including an

alleged involvement with a very notorious Fuckshire County transvestite, by the

name of Bolsa Chica, whom, he says, used to bring her weed to smoke.

Dave, however, is not prepared to believe Jeff `s story, even though Jeff is

able to accurately describe a tattoo on a certain private area of Dahlia’s

body, visible only to anyone she must have been intimate with. Equally as hard

to swallow, is Jeff´s shocking revelation that Dahlia is, by all accounts, a

former high school Teacher - turned Stripper - turned Psychic. Supposedly, a

Teacher of English Literature. Which, perhaps, best explains why Dahlia

possesses such a knack for Neo-Shakespearean eloquence. Unlike Dave, whose own

flair for Neo-Shakespearean oratory, stems from his long relationship with

Princess Sarah. "But how on earth is it possible - for Dahlia to have such

a strange three-tiered life cycle?" Dave asks himself, even though he,

himself, could not help but notice, that Dahlia´s command of the English

Language seems well above an ordinary Psychic; and, that her propensity for

lewd exhibitionism, seems way beyond that of a novice female.

Extremely suspicious of Jeff, Dave requests a background check on him. It

turns out that Jeff, in fact, was a useless 70's musician, who once wrote a

terrible song called "Cock-a-by-Lady On A Tree Top"- a song

considered so vulgar during the 70's, that no radio station at the time would

even dare to play it. The background check also revealed that Jeff once

moonlighted as a Dick-monger, selling sexual "services" to rich,

lonely and penilo-centric, old ladies. But, so much for Jeff 's own history.

Jeff`s Song:

Cock-a-by Ladyon the tree-top

When the wind blows

her booty will rock

When the bough breaks

like crispy cornflakes

down falls the lady

booty and all!!:)))

As far as Dave is concerned, he is not prepared to let anything get in the

way of his marrying Dahlia. Not even the ""scandalous and fucked-uply

ridiculous"" allegations of Jeff, the "Dickrovite".

Nevertheless, he still confronts Dahlia regarding these new allegations, and

not only does she deny knowing any rude songs, she even claims that she has

never met anyone by the name of Jeff. Furthermore, Dahlia vehemently disavows

ever participating in any multi-clitonous (involving several women) orgical

parties, marked by excessive clit-lickation without licker's license,

and random acts of pseudo-penilation (a/k/a dildoism).Says Dave in the words of a powerful rock song poetry:It is based on common knowledgethat thou hast been cheating on meI ask myself why should this beIs the pleasure worth the painCan our lovelight ever shine again[Tell me] How many timeshave you shared my loveHow many times have you lied to meLet me knowI need to knowTell me what have I done to deserve thistainted and diluted loveIn the presence of the sky aboveyou keep giving me a verbal tour de France (long,twisted or indirect response, usually meant to deceive - Colin`s Cyber Dictionary). It takes my mind back to those dayswhen we savored our heart`s delightRomantic moments in the moonlightCan we live those days againCan we kiss in the rain again

Of all the sexual events that Dave has confronted Dahlia

with, none infuriates him more than the one involving Ali Bahktali (the client

who has a "brazzar that smokes crack:)) Says Dave to Rachel during

Dahlia`s brief absence from the room: "Every blood cell in me still

cringes at the mere thought of that orangutan (Bahktali) rubbing his filthy

hands on my fair lady`s peeware" (genitalia - Colin`s Cyber

Dictionary).

The argument continues, nevertheless, throughout most of the day, until

Rachel intervenes, for the sake of peace and quiet. Dahlia lightens up the mood

with yet another of her rude parodies: "Reach Out And 'Fork' somebody`s

Ass...Make this world a better place..If you can." Dave and Rachel would

struggle very hard to hold their giggles until Dahlia walks away. One could

still hear her singing loudly as she climbs up the stairs to their bedroom.

Says Dave to Rachel: "A great Actress and Comidian she sure would make,

but for her profound and unglorified rudeness. Or is she?" They would both

shrug in helpless amazement. Dahlia to Dave: ...and should`st thou continue to talk down to me like that, I swear - there shall be no matrimonio! Nada nada! Only TRASHIMONIO! (the brazen Dahlia once threatened - clapping her hands loudly - spanking the side of her hip while poking fingers to his face as usual). - for I shall throw all my bridal attires in the trash!! EN LA BASURA!! A true wake-up call for the hyper-ventillating rock star:).

Dave cools down, as he begins to dress-up for the bachelor’s eve party,

being given by his musician friends, featuring, Private Dancer Lady Sonora -

"The Dildocentric Nymphomaniac".

 

Chapter 6: THE BACHELOR`S PARTY  

In a secret hideaway up in the hills of Monaco, Lady Sonora electrifies Dave

and his musician friends, with her erotic peformance, accompanied by her

signature tune entitled, "Doing My Thing", as she skillfully toys

with a psuedo-penile object (dildo or, dilly, in Cyber Linguistics) while a reggae hip-hop song fills the room:

Strange feeling gets me everytime I close my eyes

one that really makes me feel I am captured right in Paradise

Temptations of the night carry on through the daylight

while a voice inside my head whispers to me

I wanna hold you

touch ya

wrap my arms around you

Let me squeeze ya "n" tease ya

But I keep Doing my thing - my own thing

(Her performance then assumes a more frenzied proportion, reggae style)

Doing My T'ing

Doing My Ting

Everybody knows me like to do my ting

Me ah go do it in da mornin'

ah go do it in da night

Take me lickle dilly an' shove it outa sight

(The crowd goes wild and whistles endlessly)

Chapter 6b Dave Has Wet Dreams About DahliaSONG (female voice similar to Dahlia`s)- as he hears it in the dream:Sunrise brightens the horizonin the presence of the moonThere`s got to be a reasonAngels, be with us on our waySpread thy wings to guide usso we don`t go astray Maybe just you and Igetting signals from the skyHow far are we goingWhat`s the limitChorus: We are sailing beyond the naked world where there`s no sadnessno trouble or painIt`s the perfect place for making loveAll our inhibitions washed away by the rainbeyond The Naked World

Chapter 7- THE WEDDING OF DAVE AND DAHLIA - The Bells Of Monaco toll The

Wedding Couple A throng of guests - from top luminaries including the Prince of Monaco and all the great scribes of Israel and Ireland - Croatia and Romania - to hangers-on and wannabies - descend upon the beautiful city of Monaco to bear witness to the great occassion. Dahlia`s own partial Guest List:Pashtawi - the Nebulous Freakasoid from the Kingdom Of Showa, whose propensity to sexually engage two men simultaneously, earned her the nickname "The Double Dutchess"!:)Considered nebulous because she is always accompanied by an attendant spraying white mist on her wherever she goes. Making her real identity mysterious. Even the men that she has ever made love to would swear they have never seen her face, as she only makes love covered in white smoke. Considered one of the wierdest spirits of our neo-cosmos. High Spirits powerful enough to see her, describe her as tall with long slender legs, fair-skinned, extremely gorgeous with the eyes of a tiger.Ginsha,the High Priestess of Madrona and a descendant of CleopatraKijack,The Female Monster - a 6foot 5inches mountain of a lady with enough meat on her back that will put many a giant walrus to shame. Hence the name "Kijack" meaning, a human walrus...walrus on two legs Zania, estranged sibling of Naffatiti and Heir Apparent of GoombaylandBolsa Chica, the weed-smoking hermaphroditeWillimina - oldest daughter of Willie The Pervert, of SodomiaJacoby - youngest son of Jason The Crook from Fiducia (pronounced "fee doo shia)Gayo, the 14th son of Dingiswayo of ZululandAdrian The EunochSeejay - son of Colin The Terrible of Salonica and Grandson of Samuel the Government Printer of Aberdeenea, and great-grandson of Frederick of KentAlphonzo - third husband of FigarroEbenezer, the 5th cousin - twice removed - of Nebukadnezzar Not a single Psychic friend of Dahlia shows up, though some r.s.v.p.`d. Also visibly absent from the wedding are the world`s biggest twins from the Island of Samoa: Mount Penny-Toobo and Monte-Negro. Though both ladies rsvp`d, they were asked to get off the bus on which they were traveling (to the wedding) in order to make room for 12 more passengers!:) Much to Dahlia`s disappointment. It is well-known within the circles of Dahlia`s former high-school mates that she routinely befriended big strong girls for protection against fellow schoolmates she would regularly offend by her mouthiness and teasing. Once, as the story has it, a whole crowd of pupils she had offended were waiting outside of school grounds to kick her butt - literally:) It was a well-known fact that when this skinny little junior high school kid was seen running across the school fields at the rate of a hundred miles an hour with at least a ten yard lead ahead of her angry female pursuers!:))- half of the story would already have been known: That Dahlia must have teased someone or most times - a whole group of girls at least 2 or 3 grades higher than she was:) - and was now being pursued by her offenders!:) The other have being , "what did she say this time? Who did she just call some offensive name? What parody did she just sing to piss someone of...etc etc:) Little skinny Dahlia, as she was in her highschool days, had gone into the ladies restroom and peeping into every occupied cubicle and singing: Deep and wide / Deep and wide / There are fountains flowing Deep and Wide (a snide reference to the girls sitting on the throne easing themselves). All the while doing rude booty dances to emphasize her x-rated reference: hand motions...butt-squats...knees crisscrossing etc etc:))!. As the angry mob waited outside, there came Dahlia being carried on Kijack`s back, through the crowd, as she stuck her tongue out to further piss-off those she had offended. And as the two of them stormed past the angry mob, it was as though nothing majorly scandalous had just taken place in the school`s confines. For Dahlia (still on Kijack`s back engaged in a series of "Granny jokes": Kijack to Dahlia: "Your granny is so old, she doesn`t even have a last name!:))! Dahlia to Kijack: Well, your granny is so old, she`s been over the hill five times already...folks had to tell her, "please don`t come back now`hear??!!:))))Kijack: "Well, my dear, your granny is so ancient, Abraham (bilblical) divorced her ass when she was only nineteen!!!..And we`re talking OVER FIFTEEN HUNDRED YEARS AGO!:)))) Dahlia: Your granny gets so much on people`s nerves, she went to the cemetery to visit her dead sister, her dead sister told the other dead folks: "TELL THAT BITCH I`M NOT HERE!!!" :)))Kijack: "Let me see...well, your granny is so old, her birth certificate was written on a scroll!! It says, "Date Of Birth - twelve hundred B.C. ! Species: Unknown!!!:))) :))And Kijack herself, laughed so hard at her own joke, a bubble of snort blew out of her nose by accident:)) Everyone was scared of all three of Dahlia`s big-boned ladies notably, Kijack, Mount Penny-Toobo and Monte Negro a/k/a Umbra and Penumbra. So-called by their schoolmates because it was often said that these two - when standing face-to-face would cause great shades of shadowy darkness to befall the entire western hemisphere!:))Dave`s Partial GuestList - top dignitaries, Entertainment Industry heavyweights, Fellow Rockmates from all over the world - including the likes of Unscrupulous Anonymous a/k/a John M (famous for his killer comedic rock songs like ,And "2q + 2q = 4q2" - the world`s first algebraic rock song):I went there to learn algebra But all she did was show me her bra I was sitting there learning bloody nothingwhile she was busy flashing legs and thing:)Then she had the guts to ask of meshe said , "2Q PLUS 2q is what?"This was all that I could say: I said: 2q + 2q equals 4Q2!That`s right!:2q plus 2q = fuck you too!!:)It`s called, "Advanced Algebra!!Yeah yeahAdvanced Alegebra!!:)) As well as The hilarious rock song, The Law Of Diminishing Vaginal Returns (Advanced Economics): "The less money a man makes the less pussy he`s gonna get Does anyone wanna bet? Then bring it on / Yeah! I read it in a book in school and I`m not an Economics fool It`s called The Law Of Diminishing Vaginal Returns!:)) Other world famous artists such as Non-Genius (known especially for the power-rock song, "Please Don`t Call Me A Genius""I have had my own share of tribulationmuch more than I care to mentionFrom financial, to things more confidentialBut still I made it through. As well as "Cock-a-doodle-doo Is Not A Dirty Word!:)The Notorious Vicious Kaynine a/k/a "Mean Doggy Brown" - the rocker whose killer song "One On One With You" rocks the world of video-games - album titled, "Dickeronomy Chapter 1 !:): It was half-past nineon a cold winter`s nighta cute little poodle came into sight Well-groomed hairbraided in pinkI didn`t know what else to thinkSo I said:Hey...Poodle...what do you sayThis rottweiler wants to get with youHey poodle tell me..what do you sayI`d like to get it on with youI wanna get One On One With You I wanna get my freaky-dicky thing on youYeah - One On One With You Goes the hilarious lyrics of another:Why does this thing between my legs keep pulsatingto the point where it starts vibratingNothing but the Dickmentality in meI keep imagining upskirt flirtations/ while rude girls are giggling/ begging me to chase them to see what they are wearingunderneath their bright-colored dresses:)Nothing but the dickmentality in me The Wedding party Gate-crashers List:Jeff, The Dickrovite (Cyberlinguistic for a "son-of-a-bitch") and Ali, the unbelievable intruder - the twisted Punjab with a middle-Eastern accent

In a lavish ceremony, Dave and Dahlia joyfully exchange their vows, in the

presence of a huge gathering of guests from the entertainment and modeling

industries.

As the couple and their maids and groomsmen march out of the cathedral, one

female guest reaches out and attempts to hug Dave; but Dahlia jealously pushes

her away, and proceeds to hold a tighter grip of Dave's arm, as they continue

marching on. After all, Dahlia considers this day as the greatest day of her

life. Princess for a day! A psychic to the rich and famous, now married to a

very famous rock star. Dahlia "Daisy-Lou" Sanchez - alias, Maria Wantanmerra - is now officially, Mrs. Dahlia Mountbatten.

Note: The song begins to play right at the start of the procession leaving

the chapel:

You're just what I've been praying for

That special love to call my own

Until the day you came / life to me was like a masquerade

without a song or a band being played

You said we've only just begun

You called yourself the lucky one

That you've found in me sweet love

one that runs deeper / even more [than any love you've ever had before]

My Favorite Word Is Love / My Favorite Word Is Love

Of all the things you say / to me everyday

love makes my heart and soul complete

Yes I know it's plain to see

My Favorite Word Is Love

Note: The second verse of this song has been deliberately omitted for this

scene, as her dream of getting married is now being realized. It is replaced

with a surprise pipe-organ rendition of Colin Peter Palmer's ultra-dramatic

musical masterpiece, "A Fairytale Wedding", excellently performed by

none other than the maestro himself.

The newly-wedded couple and their entourage exit the Chapel, and are

immediately swamped by a large pool of paparazzi, eager to capture the Kodak

moment, to which Dave and Dahlia graciously oblige. Notwithstanding that,

Dave's Lawyer and Publicist, had cautioned him to expect some grueling

questions from certain reporters, regarding Dahlia's alleged infidelity, and

that he should remain taciturn in the event, allowing his Publicist to field

all such related questions.  

And, true to form, one ruthless Reporter begins to grill Dave about the

bizarre sexual allegations concerning Dahlia. Just then, his angry Publicist

fires back by appropriately quoting the words of Colin, the Neo-Shakespearean:

"What-so-ever thou gleaneth not from a horse's mouth, thou shalt

glean from a cow's backside. Simply put, less than first-hand information is

usually a load of bull..."

Completely taken aback by the Publicist's unexpected verbal preparedness,

the ruthless Reporter immediately retreats, feeling emotionally castrated

and debolsified, leaving behind the well-intentioned remnants of Reporters,

who are determined to simply enjoy the happy returns of the day, from a

brighter perspective. 

 

 

Chapter 8.

The Wedding Reception

At an elaborate wedding reception held at the fabulous Cherry-Grove Castle -

floating dome-shaped white structure surrounded by the Mediterranean Sea, Dave

gives a very short speech in which he unreservedly refers to Dahlia as his

"appetizer, main course and, dessert, till the end of time";

triggering a round of applause from the crowd of well-wishers.

Dave then chooses a beautiful rock ballad, "Second To None",

penned by songwriter extraordinary, 7Scribe7, and performed live by

his fellow musicians of the rock group, Non-Genius And Friends . After which, an ever-memorable song of Dennis Rousauss, "Trying To Catch The Wind", romantically steals the midnight air of Monaco - and can be heard as the party-goers slow-dance their hearts away.And the children all sing, "We Shall Dance, We Shall Dance!"

Dave joins the performance as lead singer, as he proudly sings and

slow-dances with Dahlia, amidst the large gathering of happy guests. Here,

again, paparazzi galore!! :

Look at you now \ outshining all the stars

Even the gorgeous moon would hide its face

So pure and so simple \ as fresh as the morning dew

You make even the morning birds seem out of place

Let’s go kissing in the sky

You don’t need your wings to fly

to my world that’s built for you and I

No other girl can substitute \ for all the joy you contribute

to my world

And as far as I know \ you’re Second To None

I’d rather be lifeless \ than let you walk away

I’d rather have my mind in disarray

Your smile is so precious \ than diamonds and pearls

Precious than any other gem on earth

Let’s go kissing......

This is my message straight to your heart

It’s time to rise and play your partThere is not a better wayA better way for me to sayDaisy, you are Second To NoneNote: Whenever you hear Dave refer to his Dahlia as "Daisy" (a nickname given to her since birth by her grandmother), you know his love for her is at an alltime high:)

 

 

Chapter 9 The Honeymoon Night

 

At the Cocoanut (The address of a mysterious jukebox)  Chalet, the couple dance till almost past midnight.

Calypso and reggae like never before. They were entertained by singer/comedian,

Lord Barry Tone who tells the crowd about a girl who was dancing rather

provocatively at a street carnival as she tries to win the heart of a young

African Prince who was out searching for a new bride, not realizing her mother

(a very strict and over-protective lady) was hiding in the crowd watching her

in a state of shock as she danced rudely with the shy Prince.

The Song goes:

I went to baccanal

a yearly festival

with scantily-dressed ladies dancing just to tease

Here comes a lady wearing cut-up jeans

She was dancing very rudely with an African Prince

She never noticed her mother in the crowd

Looking pretty angry and far from proud

Chorus: When her mama saw her dancing like that

She said no, that`s not my child

When she said mama I am dancing to earn his wedding ring

Mamma said, "Go on girl..then show him what you`ve gat!!

My! My! My!

By this time, continues the storyteller, the crowd is getting really

loud...go ahead!!! Go ahead!!! they cheered. The carribean song

continues..."...She said / my legs shall set (speaking of the girl closing

her legs as she dances )/ "...while I let my moon arise (bending over

accordingly as she dances with the shy Prince) /..." Just for you / I

wouldn`t do it otherwise

She bent like this...and then she did like that...

She said / pardon me if my batty is too fat

You would think they were gonna do the real lover`s thing before the night

was over

You would think they were gonna do the real lover`s thing

Make no mistake..She was dancing for a wedding ring

(And the crowd goes): "My! My! My!"

-

It is now almost 2 in the morning - and the Reggae boys are still rocking

the crowd:The Party Never Seems To Stop

At 1860 Cocoa-Nut GroveIt just goes on and onOh what a music treasure-troveAt 1860 Cocoanut-Grove - the address of the World Famous

Coconut Chalet owned by a close friend of Dave`s, that is notable for possessing the world`s most popular jukebox.

After their first night out during their honeymoon, Dave and Dahlia return

to a hotel resort in the beautiful Island of the Bahamas, where they kiss each

other passionately, at the foot of the stairs. He then sweeps her off her feet,

and proceeds to carry her majestically, up the chandelier-lit stairs, leading

to their honeymoon suite.

Note: A beautiful song starts to play the moment he picks her up, till they

disappear up the stairs, while the lights emanating from their bedroom window,

lend credence to their presence. They both stare into each other`s eyes as

their bedroom lights automatically go dim, and imaginary fireworks light up,

stealing the midnight sky, all in Dave`s own mind`s eye.

I thought the day would never come

when two of us would breathe as one

What started out as a fancy escapade

has blossomed into vows being made

You said you saw visions

You said you heard the church bells ring

Little did I know that they were meant for you and me

THERE'LL BE FIREWORKS like in real life

All those splendid colors will steal the sky

All because of you and I

THERE'LL BE FIREWORKS like in real life

'cause we'll both behold great moments to our delight

as we celebrate sweet love tonight

 

No more mountains left to climb

No more doubts within my mind

Now I know the difference between love and lust

Ignoring either one may be unjust

'Cause if lust can exist within the frame of love

it could be an added blessing

and we'd give thanks to the heights above

 

Chapter 10

Average Customer Review: